What Parents Want You to Know About Our Children With Autism.
What parents of children want you to know about our children with Autism.
Our Children are children first:
We do not define our children by their disorder and neither should you. In movies and in the media, you often get the message that our children can not understand or show emotions. This is not true. Our children are loved and show love. They just show their feelings differently than your children do. Our children are just like any other child. They need love, stability and understanding to thrive.
Autism is a Spectrum Disorder:
This means that every person with autism is affected differently. Some children do not speak at all. Other children babble uncontrollably. They may repeat the same phrases over and over again. Other children may be able to carry a conversation. They all have autism, they are just unique individuals like you and me. Autism affects people of all backgrounds and intelligence levels. Having autism does not mean a child is mentally delayed. Some brilliant inventors and mathematicians in the past have had autism. Many children with autism grow up to be successful members of society.
Our children have sensory issues:
Almost all children with autism have sensory issues. This means that our children hear, see, smell, taste and feel the world differently than you do. A sound which is pleasant or insignificant to us can be scary or even painful for a child with autism. Light or unexpected touch may startle or frighten a child with autism. Our children react to fear and pain negatively just like any child. But, it is much harder for our children to move beyond that fear. Many of our children have trouble eating the kinds of foods most children like. Such food can be uncomfortable or even impossible for them to chew and swallow. If you are aware of sensory issues, you can learn how to change you behaviour to help children with autism thrive and be successful.
Autism affects communication and social skills:
It is very hard for our children to express their thoughts and feelings. Often, they can not find the words to answer questions or express ideas. This does not mean that they do not have opinions or ideas. As parents, we have worked extremely hard to learn our children’s own forms of communication. If you ask, we can usually tell you how our child is feeling or suggest how to help them feel better.
As well, it is very hard for our children to read body language or understand social signals. Gestures and phrases that may be familiar to you can be confusing and pointless to our children. Children with autism should be spoken to gently and directly. They want to know what is happening just like your children. Even though they may not respond, let them know what is happening, and why.
Tantrums are a part of Autism:
If you see a child - no matter what their age - having a major tantrum in public, that could be a child with autism. Our children deal with extreme stress and frustration, daily. Most of our children are not able to express their tension the same way that your child might. Our children may, scream, kick and throw themselves on the ground for reasons you don’t understand. Often we don’t understand, either. All we can do is help them through it, and hope that we can calm them enough to continue on with our busy days.
If you see a child having a tantrum in public, please don’t approach the child and try to scold or soothe them. We understand that your intentions are kind. But, you will make the situation worse. An autistic child having a tantrum is not reasonable. They will not be able to talk to you or tell you why they are upset. Chances are, they will be frightened by you. Some children may even lash out at you. But, share a kind smile with the child’s mother. She may be as tired and frustrated as her child is.
Autism affects 1 in 150 children:
That means that you probably know or will meet someone with autism. Twenty years ago autism affected 1 in 10 000 children. The numbers are rising quickly and steadily. There are children with autism in your neighborhood and your children’s school.
More and more young children are being diagnosed with autism. We all need to be aware of the signs and symptoms. It could be anyone’s child. If learn the red flags and feel like something is wrong, please talk to your doctor. If they don’t listen and you still feel like something is wrong, get a second opinion. Many of us had to fight before our children’s symptoms were recognized and their autism was diagnosed.
Early Intervention is the Key:
The reason we have fought to have our children diagnosed, is because autism needs to be treated early. Early intervention is proven to be essential in the treatment of autism. All children with autism need therapies such as occupational therapy, speech therapy, physical therapy and sometimes Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA). As well, there’s bio-medical and naturopathic approaches to treating autism. At this time there is no cure.
Written by Susan Cosgrove.
