The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
– Mahatma Gandhi
I like that quote. And I like it even more because just yesterday I chose to forgive someone rather than make a big deal out of the situation. It was a minor offence.
Do you ever feel like you know you could forgive something bigger, but you don’t want to “waste” your forgiveness on something small like an off-hand comment. I mean those you can bring up, because they are small, right?
Except everytime you bring up something small, it becomes bigger. And then there’s this big thing that you haven’t (or won’t) forgive someone for. An off-hand comment, a small selfish act, a angry word.
I’ve forgiven some pretty big things in my life and I feel very good about doing it. I realized this morning when I read that quote that I could find that sense of peace by forgiving the small things too. Try it. It’s hard as heck when you want to say “look, dude, you really made me mad when you…” to instead choose forgiveness and walk away. Because in the end, the forgiveness is about you, not about them. Carrying anger around inside of yourself is like holding a hot stone with the intent of throwing it at someone. You are the one who is burned. I don’t know who said that, but I’ve seen it repeated many times and I like it.
As a side note, I’m always known as a hot-tempered gal. I’m a red head. (We’re going to be extinct by 2100, did you know??) But lately it’s really been bothering me that I’m “known” for my temper. Sometimes it works for people, they know I’ll fight a battle for them. But I need to ensure that if and when I need to fight a battle, it’s for a good reason. Sometimes they need to fight that battle, sometimes I need to be the peaceful one. I need to learn to do “peace” as well as I do “war”. That’s the trick.
At work they have a nickname for me, “The General”. There was some company event and we had to come up with nicknames and I was stumped … until a brave team member suggested that one. I was amused. And I suppose it’s true, I do have high expectations for my team and I do expect compliance. But I need to balance that out with equal portions of compassion, and somedays I’m running low on supplies.
