The Cat Made Me Do It

It seems like my computer time is getting less and less. One thing about living up north is the that we go from long, cold nights, to hot summer days in the blink of an eye.

I think getting out and enjoying the yard has been a huge step on the ‘getting on with life’ boat. We’ve been spending a lot of time playing T-ball and horseshoes. The kids have put so many miles on their bikes this spring. I LOVE that we bought an acreage. The kids have so many places to roam.

It finally got dry enough for our bonfire season to start. We had several friends come over this past weekend for our first one. I learned that if you take friends out of the city it’s bound to be a good time. We had fireworks, fire walking, and good eats. My sides are still hurting from laughing so hard.

I’m happy to report that single life has become wonderful. The life that the kids and I are creating for ourselves is a happy one. We’ve really become the family that I wanted. We are surrounded by great friends and enjoying our times together. I don’t regret my decision at all anymore. In fact I sometimes wonder why I didn’t do it sooner…

We have a lot of big events coming up in the next few weeks. For the first time in a long time I am looking forward to Mother’s Day. My birthday is shaping up to be a great weekend. Kindergarten Orientation is this week. I have another trip in the works. Busy, busy, busy.

Maybe it’s a good thing that the days are so long in the North. I need all the time I can get to fit in everything that I want to do. We’ll take our time and get everything we want done eventually.

What a crazy week it has been around here.

I had a kid-free weekend.  It wasn’t as great as it sounds.  I went to a court ordered seminar on Parenting after Separation.  It provided a lot of information, but unless my ex takes it and tries to put a few of the ideas to work, I’m going to be sitting in the same place I am now.   There wasn’t a whole lot of new information for me, but more of a different way to look and approach things.

The kids spent a great weekend with their Grandparents.  It’s kind of become their second home.  We try to get over at least once a month.  They really enjoy the time away from me plus they’re really getting to know their Grandparents.

It’s taken us a bit to get back to routine this week.  I’ve got a billion things to do.  We got the yard cleaned up on Monday. The dog and I are going to have a serious talk about not digging in the garbage!

I thought I was nice giving the kids a room downstairs for a playroom.  I was wrong :(  They had such a mess and haven’t been taking care of anything.  I spent a few hours cleaning it all up and tossing out the broken toys.  This is their last chance.  If I see it in that shape again their ‘playroom’ is gonna turn into my office!!!

I’m new to this area so I wasn’t sure what to expect for ‘Spring’.  I lived further north for 7 years and thought being south a bit the weather would be better. I was wrong.  It WAS beautiful for the last week.  We were walking outside with shorts on, got a little sun the one day, and the birds were singing.  This morning I woke up to a lot of wind (80mph wind warnings).  The wind soon brought the snow and it looked like a blizzard out my wind most of the day.  It’s gotten nicer again now but I wanted to cry seeing all that snow returning. They’re calling for more tomorrow. I guess winter isn’t quite done with us yet.

Each day I seem to learn something new.  I’ve learned that a tooth will get loose and fall out if you wiggle it for long enough.  Just because you weren’t allergic to something yesterday doesn’t mean you won’t be today.  And when living in the north, NEVER put away your winter jacket!!!

My nose is not red. My throat isn’t scratchy. It doesn’t feel like I’m inside an oven… YEAH RIGHT!

I’ve been fighting with a runny nose for a few days. I nearly had myself convinced it was seasonal allergies. Hey, my youngest has them, why can’t I? But my runny nose soon turned into a full blown cold!

Before kids I NEVER got sick. I was one of the healthiest people anybody had ever seen. That all changed when my oldest one started school. Schools are a breeding ground for germs. We get every bug out there! Why didn’t they put a warning sign on the application form?

It sucks being sick and being the sole caregiver to the kids. I don’t get to lie in bed all day (not that I don’t try). Nobody brings me Kleenex and soup. I can’t stop everything for the day and try to get better. This morning I was up at 6:45. By 8 I had done 2 loads of laundry, washed dishes, and tried to figure out what that was the kids stuck in the honey that had dripped onto the floor. Thanks to my newly discovered Retro Cartoon channel I was able to sneak off and have a short rest but I still had to remain somewhat coherent just in case the girls needed something.

I moved out to the couch for the afternoon. There was plenty of things I could be doing, but mommy feeling better was WAY more important. I wasn’t feeling THAT sick but better to get better now then before it got too bad.

My oldest has learned how to make a great cup of chicken noodle soup. She makes my tea to perfection. She’s gonna be a great mom some day.

I’m glad it’s almost bedtime. It’s been a long day. Hopefully after a good nights sleep I’ll feel better tomorrow.

I didn’t sleep much last night. Little one was up with allergy troubles. I’ve got a stuffy nose and it’s hard to breathe. I remember seeing the clock turn 2, 3, 5.

When my alarm went off this morning I looked out the window and the sun was shining. No way was I going to let my lack of sleep prevent me from enjoying it. This was the nicest morning so far this year.

I made a call and arranged plans to go on our towns walking trails. I’d been wanting to go on them for a while, but this was the first chance I’d had. They’re all paved and used quite a bit. We drive by them every day on our way to town.

We chose to take the one that goes around the golf course. I’d seen the beginnings and end of the trail, but had no idea what was along it. A short distance in we came to a pond. It was still frozen over, but there was signs that the ice was getting thinner and water would be appearing soon. There was a cub camp. I had heard about it, but never seen it. They had a few buildings there that they used for their overnights and training. We saw plenty of birdhouse. There were a few birds over head, but it’s still a bit cold for them to be staying.

We had fun watching what was going on around the golf course. They were using a machine to blow the snow off the greens (yes there’s still a few FEET of snow on them!). They had built a new clubhouse (we’d seen a bit of this from the road). I’d never around the greens and can’t wait to try it out this year.

I look forward to many more trips on this path. It’ll be nice to see how things change with the seasons. We’re going to try and walk it at least once a week. On Friday if we’re able, I think I will take the dog around it before we go away for the weekend.

FINALLY I am seeing some signs of spring here.

For weeks I have heard stories about bulbs appearing. Friends working out in their yard. All the birds returning. This was NOT at my house.

This morning I watched as the squirrels chased each other through my trees. A bird was singing outside my window. The sun was shining and actually had some warmth to it. It was a beautiful morning.

The kids had a day off from school today. We had no real plans. I slept in a bit while they watched cartoons. Together we tidied up. I decided we needed to get out and do something.

We drove about an hour to my favorite lookout point. About a month ago, the kids skipped school (hey, I had an appointment and wouldn’t have been back in time to meet them!) and we went to the same spot. Back then the river below had one little open spot. Today it was all running with just a hint of ice on the edge. We took some picture of the last remnants of winter.

On our drive home there were more spring signs. A family of deer grazing by the side of the highway. A black bear wandering after his many months of rest. Baby calves playing friskily with one another while their moms looked on. The baby animals are one of my favorite things about spring.

Sure there may still be a nice white blanket on my lawn. The nights may still be a little chilly, -5 or so. I may not have any flowers making their appearance yet. Every day I am getting closer. I know before long, ‘I’ will be out playing in my garden, raking the lawn, and wondering what my next OUTDOOR project should be.

Why is it that on school days my kids want to sleep until 10 minutes before the bus comes, but on weekends they are up at 5am watching cartoons???

I used to be an early riser. I could go to bed at 6pm or 11pm and I’d still be up at 5am. I liked the peace and quiet of the morning. Everything was fresh and untouched. That all changed when I had kids…

My 5 year old is a lot like I once was. She goes to bed when ever and is up VERY early. The other kids are a bit better at sleeping in. I laughed last week when I was having to wake my youngest up at 10am so that I could go to the mall…lol I think my oldest is getting me prepared for the teen years already. She hates going to bed and will sleep until noon if i let her.

Having babies in the house I quickly learned to go on very little sleep. My babies always slept 6 straight hours from the day they were born but even if I fed at 10, they were ready for another feeding by 4am. My youngest had a lot of ear infections and is now having issues with allergies and asthma so is NOT a good sleeper. She sleeps in 4 hour segments I find and then is up for 2 or 3 hours. I’ve learned to live on very little sleep. On the rare occasion she does sleep all night I’m still up until 2 or 3 because ‘I’ just can’t sleep!

This morning like most every weekend morning, the kids were up early. I heard the tv turn on around 5:30am. I’m loving my new satellite receiver that has the antenna on the back so I can use the remote in my bedroom to turn the channel in the living room. I turned on their favorite channel and rolled over and went back to sleep for a while. Tomorrow is a day off from school and I am really hoping their little bodies will be tricked and they’ll sleep in like it was a school day.

I’m sure I’ll get to enjoy sleep once the kids are older. For now I’ll enjoy my 3am snuggles, the shuffling of little feet coming into my room asking for the cartoons on pleeease. I’d miss so much if I actually slept through the night!

I think like most people, every so often I get these great ideas. They might seem strange to some people or just plain nutty. There was the time I was sure filling the pond with cornstarch and water would be a great ‘learning’ tool for the kids. Or how could taking 5 kids school supply shopping not be fun (OK it led to me breaking down and crying in the middle of aisle 4…). But my ideas always sound like a good idea at the time.

Last fall I decided it was time to paint the house. I wanted to liven in it up. I went to the paint store with ideas in mind, came out with a peachy orange and a purply gray for the living room, my interpretation of olive green for the dining room, and a plum color for the downstairs rec room. After everything was painted, I was happy with it. It took a few days to REALLY like the peachy orange, but it’s really grown on me now and I LOVE it.

Something has really been bugging me all winter though. My fireplace in the middle of my living room was painted a TAN color and could just never decide what to do with it. Deep down I would love to put some stone or brick around it, but my budget doesn’t allow for that. What to do, what to do???

This morning I got up and decided I’d had enough! That fireplace had to be changed. I gathered all my paint that was leftover from other projects, grabbed some sponges and let my hands go to work. The first few colors I was nervous. It wasn’t looking anything like I had imagined it would. Had I made a HUGE mistake and why hadn’t anyone stopped me from doing this…. 11 colors later, a break here and there to step back and ponder, I really like the end result. The fireplace definitely fits in with the rest of the room, it’s gone from blah to POP.

OK, so some people on entering my house might wonder what was I thinking with the paint colors I have chosen. They are definitely a bit unique, but I like them. My house is so much brighter and alive, especially on those LONG winter days. I’m glad I have the freedom to do what ever I want. The look and feel of my house is total reflection of me and everyone agrees it has my name written ALL over it!!!

This morning I woke up to gray skies. Mother Nature was playing her tricks again. It’s Spring for crying out loud, but the snow was falling.

I grew up in the north. Snow has always been a part of life. I have memories of making snow angels, skiing, building snow men, and catching flakes on my tongue. Christmas without snow? I can’t imagine!!

My kids have grown to love the same things. We make plenty of angels. Try to make our snowmen more interesting each time. They’ve learned that mommy is really good at snowball fights and 5 against one doesn’t scare me!!! At an early age they were out sledding. We’re northern bodies. Snow doesn’t scare us!!!

Now I’ll admit snow isn’t always good. I get tired of shoveling. When it melts it makes a horrible mess! The 4 ft snow drifts in my driveway were not enjoyable (neither was the $85 tow bill!). I don’t like when it snows so much that it becomes hard to drive and intersections become so piled with snow it’s hard to see. Yeah, there are definitely some down sides.

The sun has come out now. The snow has stopped. My pretty white wonderland is melting. Everything looked so clean and fresh this morning. The ground sparkled in the moon light. My yard has turned back into the muddy, brown patch. I know it’ll turn into a nice green paradise for the summer. And don’t get me wrong I LOVE summer, bikini season!!!

It’s only April and I’m sure I haven’t seen the last of the white stuff for this season. There will be a few more mornings of me waking up to my clean white yard. Secretly, I can’t wait.

I guess it’s really important that I look at how the kids are being affected by the way life has become. It’s been a huge change for them as well.

My ex was never around a lot. He worked 12 hour shifts so we never saw him on his days on. His days off he always managed to find a neighbor to help., or somewhere to go. The kids and I had become accustomed to doing things alone and having our own routine that didn’t include him. On occasion we did do things as a family, but it was very rare.

Initially, when things were torn apart, my ex would still come by to see the kids. He always said, I’ll be there next Thursday when he was saying his good-byes. These next Thursdays became fewer and fewer. Finally in January he moved away from here. He now lives 9 hours away and hasn’t spoken to the kids since.

I think my son has taken it the hardest. He always looked up to his dad. The two of them probably spent the most time together. They would do building projects, take off on a hunting trip, or just wander around the yard. My son misses that. He’s taken on his own building projects much to my dismay. Every Thursday he looks out the window. I think he has realized now that daddy isn’t coming, but he still hopes.

My oldest is the quiet one. I know this is all bothering her but she won’t admit it. She’s become distant. She spends a lot of time in her room alone. I try to do special things for her, but to no avail. I wish I could find the right key to unlock her feelings so that I could help her get through it.

My middle two girls are grasping for attention anyway they can. They both will do just about anything to get one on one attention from whom ever will listen. Smetimes they use means that aren’t appropriate, fighting, swearing, and stealing. We’ve been talking lots and they’re learning there are better ways to get the attention that they need.

My baby has never really spent much time with her father. When she was 6 months old he went away for 9 months. He had missed so many firsts in her life and there was no way to make up for it. I think I feel most sorry for her. Despite my feelings, he’s still her father.

The first few months were really hard. It was difficult to explain why daddy was no longer coming by. Even worse why he was now living with a ‘new’ family. I really wish HE hadn’t shared that information with them. It was too soon.

So it’s another Thursday. I’ll watch as my son stares out the window hoping. We all know he’s not coming. I hope some day it will be different, but for now that’s our reality.

One of the things I have noticed the biggest change in this last year is meal times. Now that it is just the kids and I, our food habits have changed greatly (and the grocery bill has been cut in half!!!). It was quite funny when we went to a Sunday smorg and my favorite part was the mashed potatoes and gravy. I couldn’t remember the last time ‘I’ had made mashed potatoes!!!

It used to be that I made a big meal every night. Sometimes a roast, maybe a lasagna, meat, potatoes and a veggie. Now I am finding the meals have become a lot simpler. We eat a lot of pasta (spaghetti, Mac and Cheese,…), grilled cheese and soup, pancakes for supper. I don’t know the last time I cooked a big meal at my house.

My pantry used to be stocked with a bit of everything. As I look in there now it’s only got the basics. Some flour, sugar, soup, and pasta. The junkie foods are gone. We only eat chips and candy as a treat maybe once a month. I think I may try to stock it with more healthy foods and snacks that are quick and easy to prepare.

Eating out was a luxury. It wasn’t easy getting a table for 7. I’m finding now that, the kids and I, are more daring where we will go and what we will order. Last week my youngest and I went a way for a few days. We discovered different dips. Who knew that a 3 year old would eat Spinach and Artichoke dip or Lobster, Crab, and Shrimp dip. She LOVED them!!! It’s been nice taking a break from McDonald’s. I can’t wait for our next restaurant adventure

So, today I’ve decided, it’s time to dust off the stove. Just because it is only the kids and I doesn’t mean we can’t have those big meals still. I put on my apron and have made some chili. There is bread rising and a salad staying crisp in the fridge. I’ve got over 100 cookbooks that have been sitting collecting dust. I’m ready to open them and see what new creations I can find.

I think I’m going to have cookoff Sunday’s again. Make my weeks worth of lunches and desserts. I’m sure the kids will really enjoy helping as well. A nice meal to end the weekend and start the coming week sounds like a great idea to me