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Mom of 6 with many stories! http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6 my life with the 6 pack Thu, 19 Nov 2009 14:19:25 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.1 en http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/11/19/22/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/11/19/22/#comments Thu, 19 Nov 2009 14:19:25 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/11/19/22/ Wow it feels like forever since I last posted anything, but life has been crazy! My 10 year old with aspergers has been a handful as we have had to adjust his meds up and down in order to deal with the mood swings and aggression. However, the great thing is we were finally appointed a case manager and she is amazing! I already have several meetings set up with various agencies so get help in and out of the home. Not to be whiner or anything but this will be so helpful given that I am here daily with the 6 of them on my own. AS soon as I do the next intake call she will become the case manager for my little 4 year old as well. His diagnoses was confirmed and he has aspergers as well. No suprise there. I could have told you that two years ago.

Christmas shows, shopping, baking and crafts are all on the agenda for the next while so hopefully I can keep my cool and deal with it all. I love the holidays though and lets just say it is never boring here!

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/11/19/22/feed/ New diagnosis http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/10/06/new-diagnosis/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/10/06/new-diagnosis/#comments Tue, 06 Oct 2009 04:18:32 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/10/06/new-diagnosis/ Wow it has been a while since my last blog but life has been really busy and sooooo frustrating! My little Aspie guy turned ten a month ago and as each year passes he is getting worse. Starting school wasn’t too bad but then all of a sudden he was refusing to go. I literally had to drag him out of the truck as he clung to his 3 year old brothers car seat. The Vice Principal had to come out and help me. He then tried to run off the school property but this was after his swearing, hitting, biting and crying. The worse part was that his classroom window faces the front of the school so it was a free show for all his classmates. This happened every morning for almost a week and then suddenly it stopped. I am now in the process of contacting sick kids again because they had touched upon the possibility of a mood disorder so we need to egt this under control.

Then my 4 year old started JK and holy ?!#$% was that NOT FUN! He screamed bloody murder, refused to sit with the other children, kicked a TA had to be taken OUTSIDE by the VP because his screams could be heard through out the school. After pushing Trillium hospital over the summer to move this child up and offf the crazy waiting list for the POPS program, they finally had a psychologist phone me who agreed he needed to be seen and so we saw her a few days ago. What a suprise he is on the spectrum like his brother - I am kidding I was not suprised as we have known he is not typical since he was 18 months. Now we just have to get the paper work finalized and all so we can get an actual diagnosis in writing, get a full time TA and get him help. Hopefully because he is being diagnosed at a young age we can avoid the choas we have had with Josh.

It just frustrates me so much that you can go see a Dr. for physical things and actually have something done, but when it comes to mental illness they just turn away, avoid, and pass the buck. They wonder why children turn out to be behavioural problems later on with the police, or committing sucide. I mean my son is only ten and has already tried to kill himself. How screwed up is that? My Ped is the only one who actually realizes the seriousness and is always trying to help as much as he can, he even told me that Josh is so complicated with having ADHD, OCD, Aspergers and no doubt a mood disorder that no one wants to work with him. I am not a quitter though and will keep pushing to get the help he deserves.

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/10/06/new-diagnosis/feed/ Locked out! http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/locked-out/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/locked-out/#comments Tue, 07 Jul 2009 03:51:58 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/locked-out/ Oh my the little escape artist was at it again. You guessed it Ryley! So his little adventure today was to go out to play with his older sister who is 11, and our neighbors who are 8, 11 and 14. Well, Ryley decided to follow the youngest neighbor into her home when she went to retrive something. As they left the house Ryley was last to leave and on his way he flicked the tiny latch on the bottom of the doorknob. Bingo! The poor girls were locked out of there own house! No one was amused….okay maybe I was just a tiny bit… it is sort of funny.

So the girls came over to our house and stayed with us for most of the afternoon until their dad got home with a key for that door. My children of course were delighted to have them there all to themselves for so long I don’t know how happy the girls were though. I worry about what my little monkey will do next!

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/locked-out/feed/ update on Sick Kids http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/update-on-sick-kids/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/update-on-sick-kids/#comments Tue, 07 Jul 2009 03:48:37 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/update-on-sick-kids/ So we had are final visit at sick kids. Because we do not live in Toronto we must go back to our local hospital. This is getting totally crazy. The psychiatrist we saw there does believe that Josh not only has ADHD, Aspergers and OCD which is related to the aspergers but also a Mood disorder - perhaps bipolar. Okay no suprise there, considering I have been telling these Dr’s that he goes from one extreme to another in seconds flat. I mean any child who pulls out sharp objects, threatens to kill himself or others, kicks, bites etc… and can have a meltdown for more than 40 minutes is not your typical child wanting attention. What REALLY irritates me is that I have also told these people that there is history of mood disorders in the family - WAKE UP AND SMELL THE DISORDERS PEOPLE! Argggg.

My poor son has told me he doesn’t mean to get so angry but it is as though something snaps and he cannot help it. He is really not a vicious child in fact just the opposite except when something triggers him to explode. So after our app. I went to see our own pedatrician who I cannot speak enough of - he is amazing and has done more than half of these psychiatrists. Now I am no pill pusher but at some point you have to decide what is best so we have put him on respridal and so far it has made a difference. I just hope he adjusts soon and isn’t always so “out there” and tired.

Now as for my 4 year old he has been on a waiting list for over a year and I am getting really ticked. He is like a time bomb and I am sure has a mood disorder as well. His meltdowns are worse than his brothers and at 4 he can be shockingly angry and vi0lent.

Oh and did I mention my oldest daughter who is academically gifted also has just been diagnosed with OCD? Well atleast she is totally aware of it and is motivated to end it. She is so good with her therapy thank godness and her illness although difficult isn’t taking over her. What can I say? Life her is never dull.

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/07/06/update-on-sick-kids/feed/ What must the neighbors think! http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/27/what-must-the-neighbors-think/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/27/what-must-the-neighbors-think/#comments Sun, 28 Jun 2009 03:57:34 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/27/what-must-the-neighbors-think/ So after a busy day of tae kwon do tournament, dance recital and birthday party I was finally able to sit down with a friend of mine and a wildberry volka cooler and just watch my children play in the back. Joshua has been put on risperdal and appears to be somwhat calmer. He was playing with a kite that he stole out of a birthday present bag that is for Arielle’s friend. One of those little things I have learn’t not to get upset about. So all was okay - Marie and Arielle were performing a dance for us, Ryley was trying to copy them and then suddenly out of nowhere comes spiderman leaping across the lawn trying to take out Marie and Arielle. Yes Spiderman! Okay really it was Sebastian but he looked adorable in his new spiderman mask and gloves. Thats when it suddenly got really loud. Ryley then decides to run out of the back yard to chase Joshua who was attempting to fly his kite down the street, then Spiderman runs out chasing Ryley then Zachary follows screaming “Spiderman wait!” So picture it with me -

My Aspie oblivious to all except his kite running down the street attempting to fly the kite, 3 year old chasing Joshua, Spiderman chasing babe, 4 year old screeching after spiderman. Then comes me! Screaming after all of them to get back to the house, of course they have no interest in what I have to say and just carry on. They then turn around and start running towards me laughing. Then whack! Josh’s kite hits a tree, the string snaps and the kite is stuck up in the tree branch.

By this time the new neighbor who has moved in a few houses down looks at us like we are crazy and rushes back into her house. I think maybe she saw the sign at the grocery store warning people about me and my wild children.

So we all march back to the house (except for Josh who is very upset and guarding the kite) we retrive the lengthy pole for the pool and go back to the tree where we are successful in our rescue of the kite. As we head back towards home Marie and I are carrying the pole. Ryley then jumps up and hangs on the pole as we walk swinging like a monkey.

If the neighbors didn’t think we were a bit crazy before they surely do now!

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/27/what-must-the-neighbors-think/feed/ Clean up on aisle 9 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/18/clean-up-on-asile-9/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/18/clean-up-on-asile-9/#comments Thu, 18 Jun 2009 04:19:10 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/18/clean-up-on-asile-9/ Because my husband works/lives out of the Province, I usually have to do the grocery shopping with all 6 children. It may sound bizzare but it is actually easier to take all of them for the following reasons:

1. My two oldest usually help take the youngest ones in and out of car seats, entertain them by pushing the buggies like race cars, and they are well trained in the art of taking unwanted items out of the buggy that the 4 younger ones have thrown in while I was not looking - unless of course it is something that they have thrown in.

2. Arielle and Sebastian the two ~~devils~~ darlings usually entertain the youngest ones by pointing out all the things that they would want to have, but I under no circumstances will buy …… unless I have lost all control and cannot bear to hear the screams of anguish no perfect mommy here.

3. when I only have the two youngest they throw more tantrums and cause complete chaos because they haven’t the other 4 to keep them occupied.

I am no super mom and it isn’t easy having all of them so once we are parked , I give the scary mommy look.

“Okay you guys I am not kidding no monkey business! No asking me to buy things, we are here for FOOD not candy and no toys. Ryley no climbing out of the buggy, Arielle and Sebastian, no running around chasing each other and definately no screaming - Arielle! Are you listening?” “NO SCREAMING! People are going to think you are a being taken away or something.” “Marie, Josh no fighting. Zachary, no calling people poopey head. Ryley no opening packages -”

“Mom! we get it!” says Sebastian.

Once we get into the store people tend to stare or smile - you know the smile I am talking about. The smile that really is saying “Oh my gosh, is that really 6 children? Are you crazy, you must be seeing as you have no control over them…”

It is at that point that I turn my gaze away from “the stare” to see Ryley standing in the freezer in the bakery section trying to to get a better view of the cakes on top.

Every time I go into a store I am sure I will get kicked out at some point for life. I can see the sign by the cashiers…

BANNED FOR LIFE - CRAZY LADY ARMED WITH 6 CHILDREN ALL UNDER AGE 11!

Okay my children are not that bad…… most of the time.

As I head down the frozen food section, Zachary starts his usual “It’s cold! Get out of here, you are all poopey heads! I AM COLD! You are mean mommy!”

“I know” I reply distracted. Distracted by the outrageous amount of money for a bag of milk! My children can go through a 4L bag in one day, so usually I buy it in bulk when on sale and freeze it. It seems to me that every week I have to bug my DH for more money because my children are eating more (except for Joshua who has aspergers, ADHD, and a mood disorder but thats for another blog……) OR my children are eating more - which is probably the real answer considering Ryley not only knows how to escape from the house but how to open the freezer and get to the Freezies. I confess I do serve all types of junk to my children, it is great for those times when I’ve run out of ~~duct tape~~ sensible solutions. I place a few bags of milk in the buggy and tell the children they are not to drink a whole bag in one day (wishful thinking) when suddenly I hear a voice over the loud speaker.

“Clean up on aisle 9 - repeat - clean up on aisle 9.”

RYLEY!

I slowly count to 10, turn around and try not to laugh. With a look of determination and satisfaction Ryley sits on the floor with an open popsicle box and about 23 popsicles scattered all over the floor. Shoving a grape one in his mouth he tells us all it is “Yummy”.

The other children and I try to get them back into the box and throw it in the cart. I pick Ryley up and place him back in the buggy for the 5th time. If someone could design a seat belt for grocery carts that children actually couldn’t escape from I would be one happy gal!

I tell the children we are done, head over to the cashier so I can once again feel violated over the cost of groceries, and wonder who is sneaking around to get my photo for my banned for life poster. I wish I had at least been able to wash my hair today!

So at the end of this typical day, I can give myself a pat on the back for a job well done. Ryley and the others took a lesson to heart - when you really want something don’t let anything stop you - go for it!

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/18/clean-up-on-asile-9/feed/ The escape artist! http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/11/the-escape-artist/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/11/the-escape-artist/#comments Thu, 11 Jun 2009 04:54:16 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/11/the-escape-artist/ Okay, as a mom of 6 I thought I had a child proof home. That was until Ryley came along… after the past week I have come to the conclusion that my soon to be 3 year old is really a (monkey) darling little boy! Not only has he and his 4 year old brother discovered how to open the gate on their bedroom door at bedtime and cause complete chaos, but Ryley has discovered how to unlock the front door and walk right out. Yes that is correct, walk right out of the house as though it is his given right to do whenever he feels like it. So being a responsible mother, another hitch type lock was placed on the door really high so he couldn’t reach it. GUESS AGAIN! At first he simply dragged over a stool type chair we had and climbed up - OPEN! So I removed all tall chairs from the house. Ha, now who is the champion? Mommy - NOT! The little bum simply searched around the house on a mission, came back to the door with his baseball bat - Okay stop that thought - it was a plastic one, you know, the kind you get at the dollar store! He took the bat reached it all the way up to the lock and popped it! I had to give the little guy credit but still, I was not letting him out! Finally after chasing him away from the door for what seemed to be hours he decided to give mommy a rest from her workout and play in our 8 foot fenced locked back yard with his sister. Finally some peace and quiet until the front door bell rang. I open the front door only to see Ryley standing there on his tippie toes, arm stretched up so he could reach the door bell, with a huge look of triumph on his face. He had figured out how to open the back yard gate. The great almost 3 year escape artist! Can’t wait to see what he comes with next.

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/11/the-escape-artist/feed/ Birthday party craziness…. http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/07/birthday-party-craziness/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/07/birthday-party-craziness/#comments Mon, 08 Jun 2009 03:58:03 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/07/birthday-party-craziness/ Well my 3 year old turned 4 and thankfully we got through it without too many meltdowns! Zak is the interesting one who hasn’t yet been qualified as gifted or with a type of PDD yet - we are waiting until school starts. Anyhow, we never quite know if or what will set him off. I asked him if he wanted a party with his friends from Nursery school about three weeks ago. He got very angry and declared that the children at nursey school were not his friends, they annoy him because they are all babies, and he only wanted the big children. The “big children” of course are our neighbors who are close friends and 8, 11, and 14 the other neighbor across the street who is 8, his big sister’s best friend who is 11, his brothers best friend who is 7, and his sister’s friend who is turning 6. So that is what we had! We had pizza, cupcakes, a pinata, and games in the back yard. The only meltdown came about when the pinata was busted by his 7 year old brother who was the 4th to smack it. The screaming was horrific but it was really hard not to laugh. Here is this little tyke, face red, vein popping out of his neck, fists clenched, jumping up and down screaming. Hold on because I am laughing again at the mental image! Okay really I am not mean…….. So as we are picking up the candy my genius aspie guy whispers to me that we should hold the two pieces of the pinata together really tight with the candy in it and let him “break it” so thats what we did and he was all smiles! Who says autistic children cannot show emotion! He was the hero then let me tell you.

So he ended up loving all his gifts, and having a great time yeah! So until the next birthday party in about a month….cheers!

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/06/07/birthday-party-craziness/feed/ anxiety overload http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/19/anxiety-overload/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/19/anxiety-overload/#comments Wed, 20 May 2009 03:58:00 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/19/anxiety-overload/ So while my hubby was home we decided to get passes for Canada’s Wonderland. I thought about taking them today but then banged my head a few times to shake out the insane thought - was I crazy?! (well that could be debated…) take six children on a long weekend and on a holiday Monday! Forget that. So it was off to the park instead. In some ways it was actually nice to just go somewhere that was not so materialistic full of rides and things on shelves that would surely lure the children into asking me, begging me and screaming at me to please buy them. It was nice for all, but one boy who not get out of the truck. Joshua who has aspergers has had so much anxiety it is affecting even a simple trip to the park. It began a few months ago with the front door of our house always having to be locked. As soon as we would enter the house he would start ordering people to hurry up and lock the door. Then he would continually look over his shoulder from our living room to ensure that it was indeed locked. Then the blinds on the windows had to be closed. Then he didn’t want to leave the house to go anywhere and so he would have his stash of things in his arms and then bolt out of the house and into the truck. One day we had to take his older sister to meet a friend at the movie theater. We were a bit early and so I parked and waited. The total wait time was probably about 10 minutes however, it felt like much longer as Joshua started to cry and bury his head into his younger brothers car seat. He was completely out of control and was screaming for me to leave because something was going to happen. What was going to happen? Only his mind knows. I felt bad as I did here at the park, but what am I supposed to do? I can’t avoid taking the children out because he believes something will happen. I compromised and told him I would let the others play for a short time and then we would leave. He screamed that we were only allowed to stay 15 minutes and sat in the truck. Well I am sure most of you have struggled to get little ones to leave something that is so fun, and so his 15 minute deadline extended to about 35 minutes, and we all had to hear how unfair we were to him, how I lied about the time and so forth. I asked him about Wonderland and how he is going to feel there. He quickly responded that Wonderland was completely different because they have security guards. Can you believe this? Security gaurds. I really wish I could understand him more.

]]> http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/19/anxiety-overload/feed/ Hospital for sick kids http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/18/hospital-for-sick-kids/ http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/18/hospital-for-sick-kids/#comments Tue, 19 May 2009 03:30:04 +0000 momof6 http://blog.canadianparents.com/momof6/2009/05/18/hospital-for-sick-kids/ After years of Dr’s telling me that my son was okay and so bright and blah, blah blah I finally had it when the one psychiatrist (who’s name I will not mention just in case you know him!) said to me that even though my son will not throw out ANYTHING and collects EVERYTHING and has chased the garbage men in the garbage truck down our street screaming and crying to bring back his stuff that it was okay. He is such a nice boy, and he will probably outgrow his strange form of OCD. This is also the crack pot that told me the reason my son at age 7 tried to kill himself was because his medication for his ADHD was too high. So I emailed the chief psychiatrist at Sick Kids and asked him if he would see my son even though we are outside of Toronto. We were there a month ago and I thought I was going to cry and never stop crying when they told me that my son’s hoarding was not a form of OCD but a strange obsession related to his Aspergers. In this poor childs head he believes that if he see’s something or touches something it becomes part of him and therefore if it is thrown out he is throwing out parts of himself. Strong stuff and I just truly cannot relate. I wish there was some type of support group or others out there who I could communicate with but I was told that it is not like typical hoarding it goes beyond that and at Sick kids they told me they have not experienced this before to this level and there really isn’t anything they can do at this point. We go back tomorrow so I am hopeful that maybe they can help him with some other issues. I feel guilty or like I am whining but it really is hard to live with and so stressful on the other children.

There is one bright spot however - inside his complete chaos if you need to know where something is well he usually has it on his bed. His memory is fab, and he will never be able to toss out the affection, closeness, and love he has for me and his family!

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