So while my hubby was home we decided to get passes for Canada’s Wonderland.  I thought about taking them today but then banged my head a few times to shake out the insane thought - was I crazy?! (well that could be debated…) take six children on a long weekend and on a holiday Monday!  Forget that.  So it was off to the park instead. In some ways it was actually nice to just go somewhere that was not so materialistic full of rides and things on shelves that would surely lure the children into asking me, begging me and screaming at me to please buy them.  It was nice for all, but one boy who not get out of the truck.  Joshua who has aspergers has had so much anxiety it is affecting even a simple trip to the park.  It began a few months ago with the front door of our house always having to be locked.  As soon as we would enter the house he would start ordering people to hurry up and lock the door.  Then he would continually look over his shoulder from our living room to ensure that it was indeed locked.  Then the blinds on the windows had to be closed.  Then he didn’t want to leave the house to go anywhere and so he would have his stash of things in his arms and then bolt out of the house and into the truck.  One day we had to take his older sister to meet a friend at the movie theater.  We were a bit early and so I parked and waited.  The total wait time was probably about 10 minutes however, it felt like much longer as Joshua started to cry and bury his head into his younger brothers car seat.  He was completely out of control and was screaming for me to leave because something was going to happen.  What was going to happen?  Only his mind knows.  I felt bad as I did here at the park, but what am I supposed to do?  I can’t avoid taking the children out because he believes something will happen.  I compromised and told him I would let the others play for a short time and then we would leave.  He screamed that we were only allowed to stay 15 minutes and sat in the truck. Well I am sure most of you have struggled to get little ones to leave something that is so fun, and so his 15 minute deadline extended to about 35 minutes, and we all had to hear how unfair we were to him, how I lied about the time and so forth.  I asked him about Wonderland and how he is going to feel there.  He quickly responded that Wonderland was completely different because they have security guards.  Can you believe this?  Security gaurds. I really wish I could understand him more.

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