A family in Progress

I thought that if I kept what was going on with Myles within our own little family - that would keep it from being real.

After a VERY emotional Monday, I shared our new path with many members of CPO Tuesday morning. I was scared - why? I don’t know, maybe it was because I was now facing reality. Once it’s out there - there is no taking it back, people know. I can’t even begin to tell you how relieved and happy I am to have shared this new experience. Not only was the support amazing - but I found out I’m not alone!

No longer did the thoughts of what went wrong haunt me. I had all sort of crazy thoughts running through my head - did I not eat enough veggies when I pregnant? Did I not give Myles enough nutrients while he was nestled in my womb? Is it because learning disabilities run thick in Gord’s family? Is it because there is a history of chemical brain imbalances in mine? Was it because we let Myles have too many trips to McDonald’s and not force him to eat enough veggies? See where I’m going here? Some of these thoughts were quite off. It really makes you reflect and question yourself as a parent - at least for me anyway, it was about where did we go wrong?

After sharing yesterday, I came to terms with the fact that we are doing everything right. Besides Myles quirks - he is a very smart little boy. We are now dealing with this at his young age and seeking out every means possible to help him through his life. We hope that in his later years, unlike many things I have seen and read - Myles will have overcome his obstacles and feel secure in his weakness and downfalls to pursue any dream path he may choose.

I’ve also realized that we may at times have our hand slightly more full, but in not one single way does it change anything about him - or take away any part of this amazing little boy we love so much.

I’ve researched and read and analyzed and honestly my brain is on overload. Now, I find it comforting to ask parents to share their journey’s with their kids - the highs, the lows and everything in between.

On a more impatient note - we are still waiting on the referral to the pediatrician. And we found out that our health plan coverage will only cover 1/4 of the cost for private testing. I’m starting to wonder if this process won’t only leave us broke - but on the edge - waiting for answer.

Posted by mmummy ( 4 Comments )