We just dragged our Mabel’s Labels display and other assorted bits and pieces back from a conference to our Quebec City hotel in the rain. Sitting now in the hotel room, I can reflect on a couple of self-realizations I made during my week of on-again/off-again travel.

The first is a bit morbid, but I don’t think I’m alone in saying I fret over what would happen to my kids if I was no longer around to do the job. Fair enough. The thought of not being around to raise our kids makes us mamas a bit antsy.

While flying to NYC last Tuesday, I was struck by the thought of what would happen if the plane went down. I had only left a one page list of instructions because it was only a 24 hour absence. An eternal absence would require an entire manual and during that hour long flight I had it written in my head. Death must never be far from the minds of mamas. Just yesterday someone on my trusty local mama message board (www.momstown.ca) posted on the topic of appointing guardians for your kiddos in the case of the unmentionable happening. I was impressed with myself having sorted out those details nine years ago when I was expecting my first baby. We have never re-visited the arrangement with the “chosen ones”, but it could explain why they never want me and daddy-o travelling together by plane, driving in the same car, eating in the same restaurants, etc. It’s like we are the Royal Family or the Kennedys - except really loud and messy. And while the two of us falling off the perch simultaneously may not cause political disaster, it could turn our guardians’ peaceful household into something like a “Jon and Kate Plus Eight” episode, but without the free tummy tuck and behind the scenes help.

The second realization was that when I’m away from my kiddos, I will go to great lengths to get back to them as soon as humanly possible. The show in NYC was set to wrap up at 3:00pm. I was booked for a 7:30pm flight which provided ample time to pack up the display and grab a bite in the city before heading to the airport. I chose an alternative route. Instead, I packed up the show in record time and got to the airport for a 4:30pm flight - a whole three hours sooner than originally booked. Pretzels on the plane make for a fine dinner when it means getting home to my babies sooner.

When it comes to seeing my kids after being away, I’m like a horse when it sees the barn. My pace picks up and as I get closer, I am in full gallop. It reminds me of when I was in law school and my very first baby was in the campus daycare for two days a week. The idea was that in between my classes, I would go to the library and study. The sad reality was that in between classes I would head over to the daycare to hang out with my baby. While actually in a lecture, I would think about what he was doing - which wasn’t much since he was only a few months old. As I would approach the daycare after class, I would start to run as soon as it was in sight. OK, he was my first baby and things would likely have been a bit different with the others, but that became my first and last daycare experience. My kids may have been cut out for daycare, but I clearly was not.

Of course it’s all very irrational, since after I’m home for five minutes and everyone is shouting “mama!” I wonder what the big rush to get back was. And yet, I’m just off the phone with the airline and nothing is available until my scheduled flight in the morning. Guess I’ll have to suffer with a night of uninterrupted sleep and room service!

Posted on October 5th, 2008 by juliecole
Filed under: Uncategorized