Marathon Momma

I’m marathon momma b/c I’m a runner mom who is training for her first marathon.

I’ve always been a runner… used to be a good one - ran university and club track for many years… now it is definitely a recreational pursuit. Many of my friends are still into the hardcore running scene - in fact, one of them is amazing and will likely be in the top three at Ottawa in 4 weeks… I hope to finish with an hour of her!

I was a short distance runner when I was competitive… 400m, 800m… although I did dabble in cross-country which was 5k. Now I am changing gears and I’m training for 26 miles/42 kilometers. I have always said I would run a marathon after having a baby - preferably within 1 year… and it looks like - knock on wood - I’m going to do it. Violet will be 11 months and 2 weeks. I only get out to run 3-4 times a week which is far less than the people I run with on Sundays do. What can I do? I have a baby and she isn’t always amenable to going in the running stroller. And I can’t get to the evening hill training sessions b/c it is her bedtime. It isn’t going to be pretty - but I’m going to do it. I hope. can you hear the tremble in my voice? It’s going to be rough.

“They” (as in everyone in the self-help community, my mother, Oprah) say always enjoy the present, live for today, enjoy the moment blah blah blah… easier said than done!!! I have always been one to dwell on things in the past (ruminating over past hurts, conversations, choices that I’ve made, what ifs) and make lists for the future - building up my expectations on what things will be like when _________ fill in the blank (I meet my partner, we get married, we have a house, I am pregnant, we have a baby etc)… Don’t most of us do this?

Well now I have the marriage and house and baby - and I have to say having a baby with my partner may have somewhat cured me of living in the fill in the blank syndrome… Having a baby has…

a) not been a let down… I love her even more than I ever thought I could love anyone. My love for her is fierce and primal.

b) made me realize things in my life are awesome right at this moment and I should be so lucky to stay this happy… and it really is a blessing to have a healthy baby.

c) made me appreciate my husband in a whole new dimension and fall in love with him again. He is such an amazing dad and we are even more different than I thought but this is what will make us a super parenting team.

All in all - although still very much planning for the future and being nostalgic for when she was even smaller… I can appreciate the wonder of her and my little family of 3 RIGHT NOW.

Hopefully this blog can help me focus on the today, the here and now of being a still relatively new mommy (she is 10 months and 9 days old) who is transitioning in less than 2 months into a whole new chapter which is going to be busy busy busy. Here I go again… thinking about the future when I should only plan for what we are going to do when Violet wakes from her nap! Maybe the park? hmmm…