On my way to Mother Hood

Well my husband in an effort to make me feel better about my whole best friend thing bought me a baby name book and told me to look through and jot down some names for our baby. It was so sweet of him to try to distract me. All I can think about is getting ready to try for a baby. 

Ok so anyways I am looking for a name. We managed to jot down some ideas and it was kind of exciting.

I am now filled with tons of hope for the future. Maybe this will be our lucky month.

My Husband is really excited. All he can think about is the baby and what having the baby will be like and how he is excited about being a Daddy. It is so sweet. When I see him with our friends little girl.I know he is going to be a great Dad.

 Well I am off to read my non-baby related book. I am really enjoying it.

 Goodnight

Hello All,

Ok venting time!

 My BFF is pregnant ( I know I mentioned this before but hear me out!)

There has always been a silent competition she seems to think that is between us! I keep telling her that a baby isn’t a race but a living human and she seems to understand so that aside here is my rant.

Start of Rant:

When I found out my best friend was pregnant I was devastated. I couldn’t believe that this girl was going to be a mother before me. Even more so I was upset that I have actually been trying and with no avail. She on the other hand isn’t trying and gets pregnant.

The other day I was talking to her on the phone and this is how the conversation went

” All the attention is great when you are preggies you are going to love it”

” I know I have mentioned this before ( friends name here) but this isn’t a race and a child isn’t a possesion they are a livivng human and you shouldn’t want a baby for the attention”

” Well see your are just upset bc for once you aren’t getting any attention”

” I really don’t care about the attention ( insert friends name here) I actually care about getting pregnant and raising a wonderful and healhty child”

” I just want a baby!” she said giggling. Need I say more the conversation continued until I said I have to go and make supper now.

So my question to myself is doesn’t she realize that this baby won’t be a baby forever, that babies grow into toddlers, who grow ino kids, you grow into pre-teens that grow into teens then adults. Doesn’t she realize that she isn’t thinking in the long term.

This is why I am so upset. Some of us are in the mother business to raise wonderful productive members of society who will hopefully make the bleak future of this suffering planet a little brighter. Then there are people who just want cute  babies and forget that babies grow.

End of Rant

Jeez I feel better now, I am so afraid for this baby ( who is the size of a pea) I hope my best friend will not ignore or push aside her child as they grow from infancy b/c that would be a shame.

 It’s painful for me to think about all this and still know that hopefully soon my day will come and I need to patient ( which is impossible believe me)

Yesterday I went and bought a book, I have been reading alot about being pregnant and I have realized that I am making myself crazy with it. My poor Hubby having to listen to my worries I feel bad for him. So listening to my cousin I decided to stop thinking about it ( after planning to write my vent tonight  of course) I went an bought a book that has nothing to do with babies at all and is a good old fashioned fiction and you know what it’s exactly what I need.

So a good rant ( on a blog where I am sure to get some loving and supportive advice) and a book ( that has nothing to do with babies) and I am good.

Also on a differnt note I got a new job which will no doubt help eliminate most of the stress I feel on a daily basis. Although it’s a little less money ( not enough to worry about ) it’s with a wonderful Not for profit organization. I feel that this months no baby came from the stress at work and I have been searching for a new job for a long time.

So the question is How long do I have to work somewhere to be eligible for EI and maternity leave I hear it’s only like 4 months and I have been working steady full time for the past 52+ weeks.

Well talk to you soon I guess and take care and good night ( off to read my book!)

Hi All

Thanks to everyone who commented on the last blog, I will for sure give it a try ! I have started thinking about my future a little bit today. I was off to a job interview this morning and I am hopeful to get it but what will it mean for the baby train I hope to soon hop on! The job I am at now isn’t exactly family friendly and where I am hoping to go is. But it is ok to start something new and get pregnant.

I really think that this new job will help me in the long run be a happier healthier me! My current job is very high stress where I get up super early and drive an hour to get there and then spend 9 hours dealing with stressful problems then driving an hour home.

So I feel torn between a rock and a hard place but still more than anything I want to be a mom. My daer Hubby doesn’t seem to think it’s a provblem. As long as Ihave the 600 hours you need then he said it won’t matter plus they can’t let you go for being pregnant anyways. I wish I shared his carefree attitude but by nature I am a worrier.

Oh well on a brighter note this is cycle day 1 for me so my new month has started with a clean slate and I am looking forward to trying again this month. Also all my FIL can talk about is how excited he is that we are trying for a baby and that makes me feel so great!

My marriage started off rocky with my in-laws but I feel now my FIL has embarced me as a daughter and I can’t wait to see what he will be like with my children.

Well hello!

I guess this is my first Blog entry.

I am 24 years old and have been married for one year! I love my Hisband very much and he is a very huge part of my life. I work as an admin assistant in a health care firm ( benefits) I like it it’s ok.

 I decided to start blogging my quest to be a mother to help me. I am so confused about the whole thing that I think writting it down will help me reach my ultimate goal which is to have a beautiful little boy or girl.

My Husband and I started trying this past month and I thought for sure everything would be so easy. How hard could it be right? I am young and healthy and there should be no reason why it won’t happen on the first try.

Well it didn’t and to top it all off my best friend found out she is pregnant ( which was not planned) I am so devastated.

Hopefull next month I will be more lucky!